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Being Mum Lifestyle

A little update – Walking, looking to Autumn and where is the time going?

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If you follow the Unruffledmum on Instagram you’ll have noticed a few shots of Ariella walking as of late. It’s been a really difficult journey to watch as her parent, she started walking holding on hand on the 28th of March and then in June she amazed us by walking from room to room all by herself for several days. The day I announced this great achievement on my personal Facebook she stopped and she stopped completely, refusing to walk the smallest of steps between two people and certainly not by herself to a location in the room.

The lag coincided with some of my sickest weeks with my current pregnancy and It definitely seemed rather daunting that I may end up with two children come January who cannot walk, not ideal at all given we have eighteen steps from our door down to ground level. But you come up with ways of coping and certainly I began to rethink how to cope in that scenario.

After about eight weeks of not a huge amount of progression gross motor wise we realised she wanted us to sit down, she would only walk between us if both of us were sat and if one of us tried to stand up while she walked between us she would immediately stop walking and fall to the ground. So we did this every evening, with Ariella pacing the hallway back and forth – slowly Jamie would shuffle backwards (while still sat!) further and further and bit by bit Ariella gained confidence. Ariella really finds the outside scary, she cries if she has to walk on or touch grass. We would take her to the park and sit down further and further way from each other making her walk the long stretches between us. Eventually we moved to disappearing still sat down behind rooms, over time walking clicked in and sometime in August just before we headed off to Barcelona she could walk.

At present she walks from one point to another, she can stop midway and stand for a few seconds, she often prefers to walk and her walking over time is becoming less awkward looking and more fluid. She has learnt to turn herself while walking, turn herself while standing to – set off – by herself rather than needing to hold our hands first. Sometimes I catch her walking in the corner of my eye and I’m still surprised, it hasn’t quite sunk in yet – we’ve watched every single piece of her development down to the smallest detail piece itself together. I think that’s one of the best things about developmental delay, you don’t miss a thing.

Although the last two months have been a bit regressive in terms of gross motor she has progressed so much in other areas of her development. Pretend play has exploded, I often now see her playing with her dolls, talking to them and putting them to sleep. Making pretend food in her kitchen, making soup, cutting vegetables, drinking from her tea set with dainty fingers. Her happy land set has seen a renewed spike of activity, with Susie and Savannah showing their faces once more – we even purchased a red bus for her as her reward for staying in bed until the sun came up using her Groclock. It’s so much easier to live with her at the moment when she is showing an interest in her toys rather than just throwing them around, I’m sure it’s less frustrating for both of us.

Ariella has a fantastic memory, it’s definitely her thing. She remembers numbers, counting, the alphabet, object flash cards very quickly and it’s lovely to see these things spreading out across her play. Social development too has just blossomed, she loved spending time with all the adults around her in Barcelona – taking home many of the funny things they shared. She is still shaking items in her hands left and right now and often talks of each of our friends in turn.

In short its been a really uplifting month a brilliant end to Summer 17′, I’ve been feeling better and Ariella has been making huge leaps in progress developmentally. She’s lovely nursery, she is really changing from a baby to a little girl and her development is either catching up or progress which is all we can really ask for! I’m so looking forward to Autumn, my next goal is to crack her anxiety and aggression. Some of the routines and anxiety behaviour is really limiting her outside play, I’m hoping that her occupational therapy assessment next month might help us understand which area to focus on to help. For now however we continue to just compared sizes of bites between us and hope that eventually this too will change.

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Adoration

I’m so glad we had newborn photos taken of Ariella, even though she’s older now and has developed a more child like face it’s lovely to look back in such detail. You forget the details you see, the dry skin on their hands and feet from being cooped up in a liquid world for so long. You forget that they always had the little face they have today, but it was just slightly changed. Photography today captures childhood completely, all the minute details, the milky beards, the fresh new nails, down to the odd hairs on her ears (anyone else?).

Yes I’m glad we captured that moment for eternity, I’ve been debating for some time when is best to next get more photographs taken. We decided not to for her first birthday even though I would have been first in line to do a “cake smash” style setup, I just did not get around to organising it. When next? Perhaps when she is two?

It must be something to grow up in the new world with every moment of your childhood documented, recorded and adored. I think my own parents who had four children they have a lot of their first born, some of their second. I was their third child and I do happen to have a photo album of key events, my youngest brother he only has a couple of pictures of himself as a little baby. Then of course there are our children, I think I’ve probably got a photo or video of every day Ariella has lived. I’m glad that I can offer her such a vast amount of memories to share with her when she is older, to show her all the things we did together. How much she was adored.

A camera is a save button for the minds eye – Roger Kingston

I remember once seeing a video of another parent who took a video of his daughter every day for many years, he collated the pictures together. You can watch it below, I’d love to do something like this with Ariella when she is a little older! If you don’t have the video opportunities you can always just use photo’s (another example below too).

I hope you might leave here inspired to go and capture your own children’s childhood eternally, I can’t imagine the dedication required to stay the course in capturing each image every day or week but I cannot argue with the overall effect. I myself am certainly inspired!

Lifestyle Pre Baby Uncategorised

Time, where does it go?

When you are working it’s easy to assume that time is something that the working world consumes, only releasing it’s grasp on those long awaited weekends or authorised holidays away from work. With the age of retirement slowly creeping up as humans stick around for longer on this earth work can start to feel like an endless cycle. You get up, go to work, come home from work where you then spend the evening catching up on all the things you need to do before you finally retire to bed; all this for the cycle to continue again the next day.

Somewhere mixed into life there is time, I’m not talking about all twenty four hours of the day time but instead your own personal free time. From listening to others it seems that we in general blame work for the lack of free time in our lives, but I’d argue that whatever amount of free time we happen to have we would fill it with things we have to do.

Once you fill your time with things you have to do like work, chores, child care then it suddenly loses that label free time. Those who are retired will tell you they have less free time now than when they were working, how can that be?

I think this happens because when you work you are given a routine, let’s say for example you work Monday – Friday with the weekend and evenings as “free time”. Your week is very defined, you might choose to take some of your free time and make it into things you need to do. For example lots of people have a cleaning day, or they have to look after their children during certain times. But once this is done you have the rest of your time defined as free.

This routine I think allows you to relax, you’ve worked really hard the rest of the day so you feel no guilt in spending your free time watching TV or reading a book it’s deserved. Those who do not have such a structured routine, they don’t have specific times to move into the relaxation phase and switch off.

Take for example a house wife, if you are cleaning, cooking, looking after children when do you actually get that break off point? You work every day of the week including evenings and you don’t have that same guilt free “that’s it my hours are up time to clock off” moment. Of course throughout the day you do have down time but it’s usually very disjointed and fits in between other tasks.

There is always a silver lining though, if you don’t work and you still keep structure in your life then I think you can have the best of both worlds. I’m slowly moving into this, I now only clean on certain days and make sure I have plenty of time each day just to myself – bliss!

Hats off to mothers with young babies that work, I imagine that would be the most demanding routine! Of course none of this applies if you enjoy your job so much that it’s your hobby, although I haven’t met anyone who wouldn’t prefer to be on a beach sipping a cocktail rather than at work just yet.